Man loses job after committing "microaggression" by using the word "ladies"

And no, this has nothing to do with trans.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 100April 30, 2023 12:48 AM

I stopped saying "ladies" just two years ago.

by Anonymousreply 1April 8, 2023 3:23 PM

I spell it "laydies" for the first usage but after that I simply use "cunts."

Spade = Spade

by Anonymousreply 2April 8, 2023 3:25 PM

Why do these people keep throwing softballs to Tucker Cancerson & Rhonda Satan???

by Anonymousreply 3April 8, 2023 3:29 PM

It is a darn sight better than the more commonly used “Yo Bitches”.

by Anonymousreply 4April 8, 2023 3:32 PM

You know even if the story is true, there is more to it. This sounds like the employer was desperately looking for ways - any way really - to remove an insufferable employee. I reserve judgment and maybe even command the employer for finding a creative way to get rid of pest. Some people are poison for staff moral. Their constant passive aggressive behavior and negative attitude poisoning any good mood around them. Everybody wants them to leave, but HR cannot find a way to make the exit work. Sounds like this employer became creative.

by Anonymousreply 5April 8, 2023 3:40 PM

The world has officially gone beserk. People have waaaay too much time on their hands.

I guess the relatively, newly created DEI positions in company's have to justify their departments. Instead of trying to correct real wrongs, let's waste our time on inane shit like this.

Dear (insert appropriate salutation here):

I don't give a fuck.

Signed,

A gentleman (and not triggered by the word).

by Anonymousreply 6April 8, 2023 3:41 PM

Read the article, R5. He hadn't started the job yet. He'd just been offered the position and the offer was rescinded because of this email.

by Anonymousreply 7April 8, 2023 3:42 PM

R5, HR can ALWAYS find a way to make an exit work. It's their key pleasure in life.

But yes, a microaggression surely deserves a micropunishment. One has to assume that either he'd been picked up on it and yet continued to do it regularly, which makes it a defiance of orders and organisational values whatever you think of the word "ladies" itself; or, as R5 suggests, there is a bigger picture here. Either the guy is insufferable or the manager is.

by Anonymousreply 8April 8, 2023 3:45 PM

A lot of people in town are up in arms and want to recall the school committee

by Anonymousreply 10April 8, 2023 3:46 PM

Most of us (even the worst of us) know the words we shouldn’t use, and why. And can understand how addressing women in leadership as “ladies” may offend some women to some degree. But to jeopardize someone’s livelihood because “some” have determined that a word is offensive due to a “long and complicated” history, that’s problematic.

by Anonymousreply 11April 8, 2023 3:47 PM

Sorry, I'm not understanding what's offensive about calling women "ladies." It's not as if he called them "girls."

by Anonymousreply 12April 8, 2023 3:48 PM

Humanoid w/Penis & Humanoid w/Vagina

by Anonymousreply 13April 8, 2023 3:49 PM

To Those with Lady Parts, …….

by Anonymousreply 14April 8, 2023 3:50 PM

It's MA'AM! And I have non-lady parts!

by Anonymousreply 15April 8, 2023 3:53 PM

R13 that day is not far off if we continue on this same foolish trajectory

by Anonymousreply 16April 8, 2023 3:57 PM

To Those Who Have The Capacity To Stink Like Cheryl, …………..

by Anonymousreply 17April 8, 2023 4:02 PM

The head of the school committee seems like she would be a nightmare to work for.

Uh-oh. Night MARE. when will the microaggressions end?

by Anonymousreply 18April 8, 2023 4:06 PM

"Ladies" always kinda grated on me when I was younger. But it doesn't bother me anymore. And at my age, any man who calls me "young lady" gets a smile from me whether he deserves it or not.

by Anonymousreply 19April 8, 2023 4:07 PM

To Those, Who In Their Darkest Hours, Have Found Refuge With “Summer’s Eve”, ……………

by Anonymousreply 20April 8, 2023 4:10 PM

[quote]Some people are poison for staff moral.

I know what you mean. Some people just don't know how to tell a story. It's hard to mess up The Boy That Cried Wolf.

by Anonymousreply 22April 8, 2023 4:15 PM

Would they prefer "cunts"?

by Anonymousreply 23April 8, 2023 4:22 PM

[quote]vice president of allyship and inclusion at the Institute for Inclusive Leadership at Simmons University

This is a thing?

by Anonymousreply 24April 8, 2023 4:23 PM

No more ladies and gentleman. Got that? You had better!

by Anonymousreply 25April 8, 2023 4:34 PM

Read a bit more before accepting dramatic headlines...

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 26April 8, 2023 4:40 PM

R7 Read a little bit more

by Anonymousreply 27April 8, 2023 4:40 PM

Watching those wonderful old clips of What's My Line? I'll admit to cringing whenever Bennett Cerf called fellow (is that OK?) panelists Arlene Francis and Dorothy Kilgallen "girls" but I still think "ladies" is equal to "gentlemen" and there's nothing wrong with the term. I think in Bennett's deluded head he thought he was complimenting Arlene and Dorothy.

by Anonymousreply 29April 8, 2023 4:51 PM

Women AND men who hold leadership positions in these type of local government, school and advisory boards more than often think they are some sort of demigods. This is great example of the nonsense that goes on.

They both made missteps. Ok, you were offended that he called you "ladies", and that he requested more than two months off per year. Totally fair. Just send the letter saying you've decided to go with another candidate. They went totally overboard by writing him to say they were displeased, and calling the police for a wellness check??? WTF. Who does that?

I have dealt with HR fraus who can't believe when candidates don't respond immediately...in these times/ post pandemic people know they don't have to stay planted and they will just keep finding other jobs until they get exactly what they want. Get over it.

by Anonymousreply 30April 8, 2023 4:57 PM

Please. That article at R26 was clearly written after the backlash from his dismissal.

by Anonymousreply 31April 8, 2023 4:57 PM

He wanted more than 12 weeks of paid vacation?? Ridiculous.

by Anonymousreply 32April 8, 2023 4:58 PM

He asked for 40 days vacation and 40 days paid sick leave over a 12 month period (educators are paid over 12 months).

by Anonymousreply 33April 8, 2023 5:00 PM

Do they even work in the summer or is the summer vacation included in the 80 days off he requested?

by Anonymousreply 34April 8, 2023 5:02 PM

"I reserve judgment and maybe even command the employer"

Oh dear.

Unless the poster is a dominatrix, of course.

by Anonymousreply 35April 8, 2023 5:06 PM

r34 as an administrator he is a "12 month" employee, there is no summer break for those type positions. He just gets his vacation days and sick days to use, which he would most likely use in the summer. Most teachers, teacher's aides and those who work directly with students get summers off, administrative staff work all year or work a modified schedule during the summer.

by Anonymousreply 36April 8, 2023 5:09 PM

I want this story to only fit my predetermined narrative

by Anonymousreply 37April 8, 2023 5:11 PM

R36 okay I see.

It was ridiculous of them to try to reach him after 11 pm. Who the hell do they think they are?

by Anonymousreply 38April 8, 2023 5:13 PM

Definitely, r31.

All the other items could've been easily negotiated. If you want 20 sick days, yes, ask for 40. You can always negotiate down, but not back up. It's this piece in the article that is telling:

[quote]“It is true that I was insulted by the familiarity with which the candidate addressed me and the committee’s executive assistant in correspondence that was part of a salary negotiation,” Kwiecinski wrote in her email. “While I speak informally most of the time, if I am addressing a public official — especially in written communication, and even more so if engaged in salary negotiations — I would always use formal titles. “The salutation ‘Ladies’ raised concerns among most that the candidate [bold]might make administrators and teachers feel uncomfortable if used in the future[/bold] instead of calling them by their names or titles.”

Absurd. And, as r30 pointed out, who the fuck calls the police to do a wellness check on an employee because you can't reach him [bold]after 11 o'clock at night[/bold] (per their own admission) to tell him he got the job? Maybe the guy went to bed early that night. WTF?

by Anonymousreply 39April 8, 2023 5:20 PM

R19 the teachers at my 2000s grammar school would insistently call us pupils—at the time, scabby stinky screaming adolescents girls—‘ladies’. They lived in hope we’d grow into the moniker, I suppose.

by Anonymousreply 40April 8, 2023 6:38 PM

We another pandemic to get people to shut the fuck up.

by Anonymousreply 42April 8, 2023 6:41 PM

Sounds like a horrid place to work. He dodged a bullet.

by Anonymousreply 43April 8, 2023 6:45 PM

[quote]several diversity and inclusion experts told the Globe

An inclusion expert. If that isn't the lamest thing I've ever heard.

by Anonymousreply 44April 8, 2023 6:52 PM

Yeah, I think this guy is lucky to be out of an ugly environment. Can you imagine having to deal with these WOMEN every day?

by Anonymousreply 45April 8, 2023 7:12 PM

You can't contract for 40 sick leave days. What a joke.

by Anonymousreply 46April 8, 2023 7:13 PM

If this is true (and I’m not sure it is), the schools in that district deserve to be razed.

Fuck the idiocracy.

by Anonymousreply 47April 8, 2023 7:20 PM

[quote]You can't contract for 40 sick leave days. What a joke.

A) Yes you can. You can contract for whatever both sides agree on, provided it's legal;

B) It was his opening salvo in negotiations. I'm sure he didn't expect to get 40, but you always open with way more than you want and "permit" yourself to get whittled down, maybe forcing other concessions on them since you conceded "so many" of those sick days.

by Anonymousreply 48April 8, 2023 7:30 PM

[quote]If this is true (and I’m not sure it is),

If what is true?

by Anonymousreply 49April 8, 2023 7:31 PM

can you imagine a potential employer ordering a wellness check on you because you didn't respond at ELEVEN PM????? These people are insane,

by Anonymousreply 50April 8, 2023 7:36 PM

[quote]The salutation ‘Ladies’ raised concerns among most that the candidate might make administrators and teachers feel uncomfortable if used in the future

Woke alert.

Anything can be deemed microaggression these days because the DEI ideological mantra is that it's not the intent that matters but only the 'impact' - as if people are inanimate objects to be 'impacted' instead of deciding for themselves. Mind you, the 'impact' is something you don't even have to have happened, it can be pure fantasy.

by Anonymousreply 51April 8, 2023 7:41 PM

Not mentioned yet in the above posts... the kerfuffle that has already occurred. When the news first hit, the school committee was going to hold a meeting with the public - but it would a virtual meeting (virtual ONLY). Perrone is not unknown to the Easthampton school committee, he had been the town's high school principal previously. So folks start logging in to the meetings - and the public overwhelm the system, it crashes. The committee had allowed 300 attendees, far more tried to participate.

So now, there's another virtual meeting scheduled for Monday, 04/12 - supposedly they will allow 1,200 attendees.

The town's mayor has tripped up previously and the head of the school committee sounds EXHAUSTING. Perrone says he still wants the job, which is even crazier. I hope W Springfield offers him a job and he thumbs his nose at E-hampton.

by Anonymousreply 52April 8, 2023 8:21 PM

Just the other day I saw a local news segment come up in my YouTube suggestions that said some thing about an adult female with the headline “24 year old girl hurt in accident” (or whatever it was). A 24 year old girl? Someone at some TV affiliate somewhere in America actually wrote that. Would they write “24 year old boy…”. I don’t think so.

Anyway on the topic of “lady” Jerry Lewis is cancelled. You’ll never hear him yell “HEY, LADY!!” again.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 54April 8, 2023 8:50 PM

[quote]calls the police to do a wellness check on an employee because you can't reach him after 11 o'clock at night (per their own admission) to tell him he got the job?

Way to escalate to real aggression, LADY.

by Anonymousreply 55April 8, 2023 8:56 PM

The initial vote for hiring him or not was so contentious that they couldn't finalize the vote until after midnight. That was reported in articles before this "ladies" controversy so no, it wasn't something made up afterwards to give them an excuse.

I have no idea what the deal with the wellness check was about, but I suspect it was the 3 who voted against him being pissed off that they lost their vote to keep him from getting the offer, and went overboard with the situation, claiming it was "proof" he was unfit for the job "because he's not available 24/7."

What I want to know is why those 3 really REALLY didn't want to hire him in the first place.

by Anonymousreply 57April 9, 2023 1:48 AM

Well, of the other two applicants -- Jonathan Bruno and Erica Faginski-Stark -- I think we all know who got the job.

Erica Fag-inski-Stark.

by Anonymousreply 58April 9, 2023 1:59 AM

If you read the article, they weren't upset at being called "ladies" because they find the word inherently disrespectful, they were upset because they thought it was too casual and he should be addressing them by their titles. That, coupled with the fact that they thought it was okay to call him at 11pm--when he didn't even work for them yet--tells you all you need to know about these women. He should be glad he didn't get the job because they sound like absolute nut jobs.

by Anonymousreply 59April 9, 2023 4:28 PM

[quote]The initial vote for hiring him or not was so contentious that they couldn't finalize the vote until after midnight. That was reported in articles before this "ladies" controversy so no, it wasn't something made up afterwards to give them an excuse.

No one is saying THAT was a made-up excuse, we're saying the made-up excuse is that he asked for too many days off and too high a salary which she NOW claims was the real reason the job offer was rescinded.

by Anonymousreply 60April 9, 2023 4:58 PM

This is fcking ridiculous-society is doomed

by Anonymousreply 61April 9, 2023 5:08 PM

The 11 o’clock call is a tempest in a teapot. The applicants all worked in education and all knew the drill. If the school board wants to talk to a superintendent after a meeting at midnight, which always happen in the evenings, you talk to them. That is 100% a part of the job. I don’t get the having a wellness check being done on him but it sounds like they wanted to have an acceptance of the offer before their meeting adjourned.

by Anonymousreply 62April 9, 2023 5:27 PM

[quote]And can understand how addressing women in leadership as “ladies” may offend some women to some degree.

What the fuck do they want to be called? I genuinely have zero idea. I can't keep up with this inanity.

by Anonymousreply 63April 9, 2023 5:43 PM

I truly hope an asteroid decimates this planet sooner than later

by Anonymousreply 64April 9, 2023 5:50 PM

I had a college creative writing teacher in the 90s who told the class not to use the word "lady" because of the movie Lady and the Tramp. You were essentially calling women dogs. I thought it was stupid then and think it's stupid now.

by Anonymousreply 65April 9, 2023 6:10 PM

Some women like being called ladies. Maybe it’s a generational thing.

by Anonymousreply 66April 9, 2023 6:20 PM

[quote]If you read the article, they weren't upset at being called "ladies" because they find the word inherently disrespectful, they were upset because they thought it was too casual and he should be addressing them by their titles.

r59 are you serious with this? 🙄 Come on MANNNNN

by Anonymousreply 67April 9, 2023 6:25 PM

R67, read the article before you respond. The post at R59 is absolutely correct.

by Anonymousreply 68April 9, 2023 7:00 PM

[quote] If the school board wants to talk to a superintendent after a meeting at midnight, which always happen in the evenings, you talk to them. That is 100% a part of the job.

Yes but he didn’t actually *have* the job at this point. It’s ridiculous to call someone with a job offer after 11pm. And this wasn’t an emergency situation where say the superintendent had died and they needed a replacement asap. This was a vote to replace a returning superintendent. The call absolutely should have happened the next day.

by Anonymousreply 69April 9, 2023 7:49 PM

The only thing more amazing than the wingnuts thinking their supporters are so stupid they would fall for a bullshit headline like this is that their supporters keep proving them right.

by Anonymousreply 70April 9, 2023 7:54 PM

[quote][R67], read the article before you respond.

It's cute that you believe her [italic]post-controversy[/italic] statement as to what happened.

by Anonymousreply 71April 9, 2023 8:10 PM

So many rightwingers seem to be citing "DEI" now en mass. I mean, I'd never heard that initialism before and now it's everywhere.

Is it because they lost the thread with "CRT?"

I gotta hand it to the right. they may be terrible people but they sure are good at getting "the flock" to blabber the same talking points at the same time.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 72April 9, 2023 9:30 PM

They thought it was too casual and he should be addressing them by their titties

by Anonymousreply 73April 9, 2023 9:33 PM

People are IDIOTS if they think it's merely things like this that looses people jobs.

Here's reality, folks. It's these kinds of things that are THE LAST STRAW for people who've fucked around in other ways to get them on people's bad sides.

I'm not clicking on OPs link but I GUARANTEE there's OTHER FACTORS in play before the "ladies" thing. Don't be morons.

Offsite Link
by Anonymousreply 74April 9, 2023 9:36 PM

[quote] People are IDIOTS if they think it's merely things like this that looses people jobs.

I can think of another thing that makes people idiots.

by Anonymousreply 75April 9, 2023 9:40 PM

[quote]things like this that looses people jobs.

Oh, dear!

by Anonymousreply 76April 9, 2023 9:40 PM

Planned Parenthood was asking for contributions on the Morning Joe podcast the other day. They were pointing out that even in states where abortion is legal, women still need help--with childcare, transportation to and from clinics, etc., especially Black women. I was getting ready to whip out the plastic, but then I realized that they hadn't actually said Black "women." They said something like "Black child-bearing people," or some euphemism like that. I found that stunning, that you can't refer to women going to an abortion clinic to have an abortion. Can anyone tell me what kind of child-bearing person who is not a woman is going to an abortion clinic to have an abortion?

by Anonymousreply 77April 15, 2023 2:07 AM

The original feminist objection to "ladies" was that it was constantly used opposite the term "men", instead of "women". It was felt this helped confer "delicate flower" status on women and stopped them being considered as serious as men. (Remember that this was in the days when women weren't allowed to fly jets because they got periods, or be beat police because they were too small and too delicate to be exposed to violent criminals.) As far as I know there was no big objection to it in a context where men would be called "gentlemen", as in "ladies and gentlemen" or when addressing either group directly.

[quote]Can anyone tell me what kind of child-bearing person who is not a woman is going to an abortion clinic to have an abortion?

I know this one! It's an FTM trans person who has not had a hysterectomy but is a man and is, obviously, sleeping with a penised man.

by Anonymousreply 78April 23, 2023 3:37 PM

I often have conversation with female friends about using "ma'am." When I was a cashier in a charity bookstore, I used the word as in, "thank you, ma'am." I was told by a female colleague that the word is totally verboten now. Not sure why, because in its long form—madam—it's used to address females in exalted positions: Madam Vice-President, Madame Secretary. Maybe someone here can enlighten me.

by Anonymousreply 79April 23, 2023 3:48 PM

Everyone can relax. I’ve called the police and asked for wellness checks for everyone on this thread that hasn’t responded to a comment on their post.

by Anonymousreply 80April 23, 2023 4:09 PM

I believe that we should start employing people as experts in Homogeneity, Unfairness, and Exclusion.

by Anonymousreply 81April 23, 2023 6:19 PM

R79 After being addressed initially as "Your Majesty" in an encounter, Queen Elizabeth II was subsequently addressed as "Ma'am".

Why don't all of these cunts found an all-female colony somewhere and stick to making each other miserable?

by Anonymousreply 82April 23, 2023 6:25 PM

[quote]They said something like "Black child-bearing people," or some euphemism like that.

Planned Parenthood is all about the T now. They're never getting another penny from me.

by Anonymousreply 83April 29, 2023 1:25 PM

R29 I remember when my mom and her friends would get fake-mad if you *didn't* call them girls. "Women" sounded formal and elderly, to them. I don't think Cerf was doing anything his colleagues would have objected to.

When I went to college some female students got mad if you called them girls. Even though some were still teenagers, and in high school they had been called girls. Only a year ago, or whatever. Now they were feminists. This was the '80s.

It's almost impossible to keep up with the changing terminology. Like, whoever thought it would be okay to call someone "queer"?

For all we know, in 10 years women, or girls, will want to be called ladies. I wouldn't be surprised.

by Anonymousreply 84April 29, 2023 2:18 PM

[quote] The original feminist objection to "ladies" was that it was constantly used opposite the term "men", instead of "women". It was felt this helped confer "delicate flower" status on women and stopped them being considered as serious as men.

As in, "men and ladies"? When was that ever used?

by Anonymousreply 85April 29, 2023 2:23 PM

What fake ass news site is that. zzzz

by Anonymousreply 86April 29, 2023 2:33 PM

I don't know what post you're referring to R86, but the story of about the man losing out on a job heading school's in Easthampton, MA is true.

BTW - the latest update is that the school committee is going hire an interim superintendent for a year and then try, try, try again. That decision was made after a second candidate pulled her candidacy after text/social media posts she had written opposing MTF high school athletes competing against other (naturally-born) female athletes were found and sent to the school committee.

Easthampton looks really foolish... but hey, there are elections to vote out the mayor and members of the school committee, right?

by Anonymousreply 87April 29, 2023 4:58 PM

It's "MISS JOAN CRAWFORD".

Or are you trying to embarrass me in front of these reporters?

by Anonymousreply 88April 29, 2023 5:40 PM

Recently I met a woman in a professional setting and, since she called me "Mr." with my last name and gave me her first and last name, I said, "A pleasure to meet you, "Ms. __."

She responded with an odd tone, "I'm Doctor __. I earned my doctorate. Or you may call me (her first name).

This wasn't a kid. It felt like a passive-aggressive micro-aggressive ambush, and I didn't understand it. Since then I'm needing to be in discussions with her one on one, but always want to ask her what crawled up her cunt and died to make her so snarly.

by Anonymousreply 89April 29, 2023 8:00 PM

r13, I say, "Carbon based lifeform".

by Anonymousreply 90April 29, 2023 8:07 PM

We’re obsessing about “micro aggressions” while the Chinese are plotting our downfall.

by Anonymousreply 91April 29, 2023 8:19 PM

good point R91, very good point

by Anonymousreply 93April 29, 2023 9:04 PM

Insanity.

I am generally moderate on DEI stuff, I appreciate the good intentions, but this is a clear example of where something has gone way too far.

by Anonymousreply 94April 29, 2023 9:07 PM

The combination of mens room or locker and ladies room or locker was common R85. In that context it’s wrong because the terms are mismatched. And dear ladies as a form of addressing a superior at work could sound condescending.

But I love the word lady when used appropriately, and “lovely lesbian ladies” has a beautiful ring to it.

Easthampton wishes it could be Northampton and Florence wishes it weren’t and I wouldn’t wish West Springfield on anyone.

A person who calls the police on someone because they go to bed at a decent hour deserves a restraining order not a position of power.

by Anonymousreply 95April 29, 2023 9:09 PM

The vast majority of my company, including the entire leadership team, is female. I cannot tell you how many times I have been the only man on a conference call, and the first thing the person (a woman) leading the call says is, "Hi, ladies."

I guess I should be finding complaints stating that they are committing microagressions against me for calling me a lady - obviously, they are homophobes and are implying I am a woman. Or, they may be ignoring my presence because I am a man, and they are committing sexual discrimination

Silly me for just ignoring, and not being bothered by it

by Anonymousreply 96April 29, 2023 9:29 PM

[quote] So many rightwingers seem to be citing "DEI" now en mass. I mean, I'd never heard that initialism before and now it's everywhere.

Possibly because you don’t have a high paying job. Many of us have printed right in our literature at work.

by Anonymousreply 97April 29, 2023 9:40 PM

the article goes to the "vice president of allyship and inclusion at the Institute for Inclusive Leadership at Simmons University" for her to weigh in. HMMM wonder what she thinks. Trying to imagine a job like that.

I actually see nothing wrong with pointing out that its no longer appropriate to use "Ladies" when addressing a group of women. Times change. It may be infantilizing or demeaning. Its the punishments that come along with crossing these imaginary boundaries that inflame people who might otherwise be down to learn and grow. And it comes with a real political cost.

by Anonymousreply 98April 29, 2023 9:52 PM

R95 Yeah, you're right. I didn't think of that. I'm surprised anyone found that condescending, it was probably meant as respectful. But I get the point.

by Anonymousreply 99April 30, 2023 12:44 AM

OP, perhaps you shouldn't believe everything you read on right-wing blogs

by Anonymousreply 100April 30, 2023 12:48 AM

You Might Also Like