r68, I don't like to be argumentative (maybe I do, a little) but yeah. There are bisexuals.
I don't like to argue this because I was caught up in that generation where I could go to a gay club and get approached all night by married women. I even stopped going to clubs in my mid 30s and still had female married coworkers approach me for sex with their dipshit husbands waiting in the wings. It infuriated and disgusted me.
Were these women bisexual? I don't know, but I felt, as a lesbian, they should leave me the fuck alone. I was very hostile toward them approaching me for sex and it was my right to be so. If you are bisexual, fine. But don't ask a gay to be part of your party. To me, it is just disrespectful.
Over the years I have met exactly 2 people who I am certain are bisexual. The funny thing about them is, they never said they were bisexual. They just lived their life. And it turns out I had been in serious BFF and familial relationships with them my whole life.
I think "bisexual" has gotten such a bad rap that the honest to goodness bisexual people feel embarrassed about claiming the label.
Those 2 very dear people never told me they were bisexual despite the combined decades we have spent together. Looking back, in fact, they never said a word to me proclaiming their gayness. I just ASSUMED they were gay because I am gay and we went to the same places and talked about the same things. I think the closest either ever got to declaring their sexuality was "I like who I like." And this was said next to never.
I know from knowing and loving them over lots of years that they honestly don't care about sex (as in male female) and quite naturally fall in love with either as situations present themselves. I also have observed that they are less directed by the act of sex than my lesbian or gay friends. Perhaps that is borne more out of caution. Or we just collectively aged out and I didn't notice when they were young and horny.
At either rate, I understand your position and also understand that my story isn't any sort of proof for the next person. But because I value these 2 people in my own little circle so much I hate to think of them shunned for something they simply can't help. I also like to think that my own past prejudices can help another person along.
I will not date a bisexual woman. I do not find them attractive. I like to keep my home very woman centric and I can imagine gay men feel the same way. I just happen to know that bisexual people can make delightful dinner guests, tend to be charmingly self aware, and don't throw off the conversation too much.
